Filthy Casual for Life

Habits. I have a lot of habits. Actually, I have a lot of rituals. So, lets talk about those.

First, let me start with a disclosure. I have the diagnosis of Bipolar II with OCD tendencies. My rituals will make more sense with that knowledge.

Every Saturday morning at 6:00 a.m., my husband and I go to Chick-Fil-A for breakfast. I normally order the same thing. A chicken biscuit meal with a diet Dr. Pepper. We sit at the same table. I sit in the same chair. My husband grabs my condiments and sets them in front of me in the right order. My napkin must face the right way. I must fold the ends of the wrapper in a certain way. My food must absolutely NOT touch. My drink needs to face a certain way. If anything is wrong, I get annoyed and irritated. Irrationally so. Sometimes, I need to mix it all up and start again. Sometimes, my husband is almost finished eating by the time I actually start. Then, we go grocery shopping across the street. This routine happens every Saturday morning.

Most people don’t realize that I am this way. When I eat in very public areas, or with co-workers, or with friends, I focus really hard on not being weird. This often leads to me eating very little and being very quiet. Mostly because I have a whole bunch of crazy talk in my head. It’s hard for me to hold a conversation. I just sit there and smile, usually. Even at home, I tend not to go hardcore on my rituals. I am always trying to “better” myself and that means forcing myself to not do my rituals like I want to.

Most of my rituals surround food. For example, I like to pick the broken tortilla chips and eat those first. I feel bad for the broken tortilla chips. I tend to eat in a clockwise direction. I like to cut sandwiches into fourths, or even numbers.

What about you? Do you have any rituals you do?